I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
