And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Randomize
