Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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