If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Randomize
