she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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