Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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