He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
