I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
