i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
