the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
