She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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