I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
