Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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