Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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