Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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