it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Randomize
