Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
im holly from the hills drunk
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
