Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
