Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
