When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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