My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
