i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
