Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
