i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
