So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
