I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
