how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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