So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I came so hard my ears popped.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize