my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
