windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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