One girl and one boy is just not enough.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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