I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Still dying that you shit outside
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
