oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize