summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
