Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I would ride that face into the sunset
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
