I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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