if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize