Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
