Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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