I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
