Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
