he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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