Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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