He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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