We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
