this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
