yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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