Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just want nice things and good sex
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
