So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
