Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
