no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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